You Are Always Whole: Facing the Dark Through Retrograde

Loves, Myrah here. I want to write to you from Bali about the thing most of us would rather not name in a season like this one. The dark.

I know these retrogrades have you facing your darkest of dark right now. The fears you were sure you had already dealt with, rising up again, bigger than they have any right to be. So before anything else, I want to tell you the simplest true thing I know. You are always whole. No matter how large or small this season makes you feel, nothing about it subtracts from you.

Why do retrogrades bring your fears to the surface?

Retrograde seasons are associated in astrology with review, revision and return, and that inward turn tends to surface old fears you believed were already resolved. The planets are not creating the fear. They are turning up the light on what was already there, so it can finally be seen and moved through.

So when the deep, dark fear comes up during this time, it is not a sign that you are going backward. It is the thing asking to be looked at. You are facing it precisely so you can move through it, to another level of yourself.

How do you face your fears without being swallowed by them?

You face a fear by looking at it directly and taking one small, honest action toward it, while remembering the feeling is temporary. Naming a fear and moving a single step toward it quietly reduces its power. You are not being asked to fix everything at once. You are only being asked to stop turning away.

So look at it. Don't flinch. Take one real action, however small, and let yourself remember, in your body, that this is not forever. The dark hour is still part of the same day as the sunrise.

What does it mean that you are always whole?

To be whole means nothing essential in you is missing, even on the days you feel broken. Fear, grief and doubt are passing weather, not evidence of damage. Wholeness is the ground underneath all of it. You can feel small and still be complete, still be loved, still be someone who makes it through.

This is the truth I keep returning to. The light in you and the dark in you are not two different people competing for the win. They are one whole, held together. You do not have to amputate the hard parts to be good. You get to carry both.

The Two Moons Kundalini Playsuit: wearing both sides at once

This is the piece I made for exactly this feeling. The Two Moons Kundalini Playsuit carries a yin yang in bright Harvest Moon red and soft Moon Milk off white, swirled from the collarbone to the ankle. Both sides of yourself, the bright and the quiet, worn at once.

Nothing on it is printed. Every curve of the yin yang is cut from linen and sewn in by hand by the same artisan families in Bali who have made the Kundalini since the beginning. It is the most demanding Kundalini we have ever made, and an evolution of the piece so many of you reach for first.

• Colorway: Harvest Moon red and Moon Milk off white, pieced by hand.
• Fabric: 100% linen, with the wide leg and easy fall of the original Kundalini.
• Fit: S/M, M/L and Extra Large, cut generously, fitting most women US 2 to 16.
• Price: $358 USD, with free worldwide shipping over $350.
• Edition: a pre-order, only thirty made in all, ten per size. The last new piece of our year.

Because every part of the pattern is placed by hand, the yin yang falls a little differently on every playsuit. No two are the same. When they are gone, they are gone.

Hold both sides at once The Two Moons Kundalini Playsuit A hand-pieced yin yang in Harvest Moon red and Moon Milk linen. Pre-order, thirty made, the last new piece of our year. Pre-order the Playsuit — $358

Frequently asked questions

Why does retrograde season bring up fear?
Retrograde seasons are linked in astrology to review and reflection, which naturally turns attention inward. That inward turn tends to surface old fears and unresolved feelings, not to punish you, but so they can be seen and finally moved through.

How do I move through fear during retrograde?
Look at the fear directly instead of avoiding it, take one small and honest action toward it, and remind yourself the feeling is temporary. Facing a fear in small, deliberate steps lowers its hold on you over time.

What does the yin yang symbolize?
The yin yang symbolizes wholeness made of opposites. Light and dark, active and still, held together as one complete whole rather than two forces at war. It is a reminder that you can contain both and still be entirely yourself.

What is the Two Moons Kundalini Playsuit?
It is a 100% linen playsuit with a hand-pieced yin yang in Harvest Moon red and Moon Milk off white, made in Bali. It is an evolution of the original Kundalini Playsuit, with the same wide leg and easy fall, priced at $358.

Is the Two Moons Playsuit a pre-order, and when does it ship?
Yes, it is a limited pre-order of thirty pieces. Allow roughly 3 to 6 weeks from order to shipment, then 5 to 15 business days with DHL. Orders over $350 ship free worldwide.

Written by Myrah Penaloza Founder and designer of Myrah Penaloza, a conscious slow fashion house based in Bali. A Gurmukh-trained Kundalini yoga teacher and student of the Cha Dao tea ceremony, she designs botanically dyed linen garments made by hand with Balinese artisan women, built around astrology, intentional living and sacred femininity.

Last updated: October 27, 2026